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March 22, 2022"TAKES ONE TO KNOW ONE?"
Today’s passage from Matthew (18:21-35) is the parable of the unforgiving servant who himself has been forgiven a huge debt by his master. But he demands repayment from a fellow servant for a relatively minuscule debt and has this servant thrown into prison when he fails to make good. The master, on learning of this, has the first servant thrown into prison and tortured until full payment has been made.
All of this is occasioned by Peter asking Jesus how many times he must forgive his brother or sister. 7 times? And the well-known response from Jesus is 70 x 7. No limit.
Forgiveness can be, and very often IS, very difficult. If this were not the case, I doubt very much that there would be so very many fractured families, friendships, and other relationships that we all know personally.
I frequently think that this theme arises so often in the gospels “simply” because we need to be reminded so often of our need to forgive and be forgiven!
And if all the solutions ‘out there’ were easily achieved and executed, then again, the issue would not be as frequent and difficult as it in fact is.
And it often can take a long time. I don’t know if a person is capable of forgiving a significant hurt until that person is ready to do so. And the ‘timetable’ seems to be as unique as each individual.
All of this presupposes, of course, an honest and ongoing effort to reach the point of forgiving the offender. This effort is what Jesus calls us to.
Sadly, there are cases when it never takes place. Wounds are meant to be healed, not nursed along nor fed.
A reflection I end with goes back to the well-known phrase that it takes one to know one. This can cut both ways. But it speaks of kindred spirits.
In this context I read a reflection ‘somewhere back down the road’ that only one who has truly given forgiveness from the heart to another can
fully experience and take in the forgiveness of God for him/herself. And vice versa; one who has truly taken in God’s forgiveness can now truly and fully forgive another.
To the extent that a part of my heart is ‘hardened’ by lack of forgiveness, to that extent am I fully able to receive God’s forgiveness? Or is it partially blocked by that hardened ‘area’ of my heart?
Likewise, to the extent that I have fully experienced God’s forgiveness of and goodness toward me, to that same extent I am now better able to
offer it to another ‘simply’ because I now have experienced its power to heal and free me up.
Maybe this is what Jesus was referring to when he told us to pray—
“Forgive us our trespasses as we forgive those who trespass against us”?
